Nostalgia.

According to dictionary.com, nostalgia is:

a wistful desire to return in thought or in fact to a former time in one’s life, to one’s home or homeland, or to one’s family and friends; a sentimental yearning for the happiness of a former place or time: a nostalgia for his college days.

SPOT ON.

I’m feeling incredibly nostalgic right now. Nostalgic in so many different ways.

I wish I were back in college right now. Back in Starkey 584. Killing/running away from bugs with the roomie. Staying up late into the wee hours just chatting online when I should be sleeping and/or doing schoolwork. Cramming for exams. Staring at a blank word document hoping that words will miraculously appear and organize themselves. Reading hundreds and hundreds of pages for my anthro class. Standing in the take out line, excited for burger night. Bubble tea at I’s Cafe, bolis at stuffyerface, fat sandwiches from the grease trucks. Waiting for the EE/F bus. Seeing the overpacked bus and deciding to walk to class through the beautiful cook/douglass campus instead.

I miss all of these things I took for granted.

I miss having roommates. I miss the ability to just turn my head and start a random conversation with someone. I know that I can easily call/text/IM/FB/tweet anyone in the world whenever I want but it’s just not the same. It’s not as comforting as having a physical person within reach of you to spark up a convo. Create new memories with. Share laughs or even tears with.

I miss the simplicity of college. Everything you need and/or want is right there, in our little bubble. We needn’t venture off campus unless we want to. I miss all the familiar faces. I miss just seeing a friend and giving nod or a smile and just that is enough to make your day at times.

I miss the spontaneity of my days.

I miss the fixed yet flexible schedule college allowed for. Of course I had classes that I had to attend. Then there were classes that I’d skip here and there. I spent many more hours outside of the classroom on classwork but it was still my time. It was still on my terms. I hung out when I wanted. I ate when I wanted. I watched my shows when I wanted. I went to bed whenever I wanted.

I was a lot more responsible then. I was lot more focused then. Strangely, I had a lot more freedom then.

I miss Rutgers New Brunswick.  And I miss Rutgers Newark. And I even miss Bucknell. Yes, I chose to leave Bucknell but that was my first college experience. I went through freshman orientation there. I did all those silly ice breakers. Experienced life away from home for the very first time. And boy was it fun. And for that, I will always feel a special connection to Bucknell. I began my journey there and ended and completed my college career at Rutgers. And it was a quite the experience that I would love to revisit.

My facebook newsfeed is filled with graduation statuses/pics. It’s strange not being a part of it. It’s strange congratulating others and not partaking in the graduation festivities. When did all of this happen? How has a whole year passed since graduation? Almost tempted to go put on my graduation cap & gown for the hell of it lol. Is that crazy? Maybe a little. I’m definitely not going to. Just a thought.

So many thoughts still running through my head but I am not in my college days anymore. I cannot allow myself to stay up until 4am just for the sake of it and let myself sleep in and miss my morning class. Work does not allow me to.

And so with this, my visitation to the past stops here. Though, I’ll probably lay in bed and think back on some of the great memories of a former time in my life. That’s not to say that I haven’t created some great memories since I’ve graduated, because I most certainly have. I just think it’s useful and therapeutic to reminisce. I am who I am today because of everything in my past.

So congratulations to all the new graduates of the numerous different colleges/universities! I hope you all cherished this day! Wish you the best of luck and all the success in whatever life has in store for you next.

Also, I recently read stories about Boston University’s & UCLA’s graduation ceremonies.

Boston University invited 1970 grads to come back and partake in the graduation ceremonies since theirs were canceled because of the Kent state killings. Read more here.

UCLA granted honorary degrees to Japanese Americans that were forced to leave the university during WWII. Read more here.

I thought it was a great step for both universities to take. It is unfair to deny a student their moment to walk with pride. To share this moment with their friends & families. To don their cap & gown and relish in their moment of closure with college. It is unfortunate that many were unable to attend and some had passed away but it was very touching to read about these graduates.

Music of the moment: Triangle Offense – The Courting Mixtape

I have the pleasure of knowing these three very talented gentlemen. And I recommended their mixtape to you as not only a friend but as a fan of TO. You can download your own copy fo FREE!

The whole damn thing is GREAT. I can’t single out one song as my favorite but I do have a favorite section of the album. Show Me Love to Strobe Lights is my absolute favorite part of the mixtape. I love the feel of these songs. I love the transition. I love the journey. I love the story. So download it here and love it with me!